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Its Not The End Of The World
EVERYBODY DOING ALL RIGHTTONIGHTé ME TOO, I GOT TO SAY I'MFEELING LUCKY AND GRATEFUL TO BE ALIVE. I'M COUNTING MY BLESSINGS. I'M UP TO FOUR AND A THUMB. BUT YOU KNOW WHO REALLY HADA ROUGH DAYé THOSE FOLKS OVER AT EBIBLEFELLOWSHIP. THEY'RE A CHURCH GROUP INPENNSYLVANIA THAT PREDICTS
THE END OF THE WORLD AND NOTAS THEIR NAME WOULD SUGGEST A BOOK CLUB THAT READS THEBIBLE ONLY ON KINDLE. THESE FOLKS GOT FAMOUS A FEWYEARS BACK FOR PREDICTING THAT JUDGEMENT DAY WOULDFALL ON MAY 21st, 201 YOU PROBABLY SAW THOSE SAVE THEDATE BILLBOARDS. I RSVPED IMMEDIATELY ANDREQUESTED THE VEGETARIAN OPTION AT THE APOCALYPSE. WELL, IT TUSHES OUT THEIRMATH WAS A LITTLE OFF.
I THINK THEY FORGOT TO CARRYONE OF THE HEARSTMEN. BUT THEY TOOK ANOTHER LOOKAT THE BOOK OF REVELATION RECENTLY, CRUNCHED THENUMBERS THROUGH THEIR JESUS CALL COUP LATER ANDDISCOVERED THAT IN FACT THE PLANET WAS SUPPOSED TO BEPERMANENTLY DESTROYED YESTERDAY, OCTOBER 7th. AND SPOILER ALERT,(LAUGHTER) (CHEERS AND APPLAUSE)ANYWAY, I HAVE SOME SYMPATHY
FOR THOSE GUYS. I'M SURE THEY FEEL TERRIBLETODAY. PROBABLY FOR A LOT OFREASONS. CUZ YOU KNOW THAT ONE THINGYOU SAID YOU WOULD BE WILLING TO DO IF THE WORLDWAS GOING TO COME TO AN ENDé THEY PROBABLY DID THAT LASTNIGHT. IT'S GOING TO BE AWKWARD ATWORK TODAY. HEY, BRENDA.
SO I'M SENDING THE FOLKS ATEBIBLE FELLOWSHIP THIS SYMPATHY CARD. IT SAYS MY DEEPESTCONDOLENCES FOR EVERYTHING STILL EXISTING. BUT YOU DID BELIEVE EBIBLEFELLOWSHIP YOU CAN'T BE TOO SURPRISED. THOUGH THEIR PAMPHLET SAYSTHAT OCTOBER 7th, 2015 WILL BE THE END.
WORLD, THEY HEDGE THEIR BETBY ADDING THERE IS A STRONG LIKELIHOOD. STRONG LIKELY HOOD T MIGHTHAPPEN. BUT IF IT DOESN'T, IT IS NOTLIKE IT'S THE END OF THE WORLD.
2012 The End Of The World
History has a long and rich tradition of apocalypticpredictions â€“ all of which were wrong â€“ yet some people still think that this time 'roundin 2012 is the real deal. Why 2012éBecause of ancient Mayan calendars. Obviously. Mayan calendars not only recorded the daysand years, but also longer cycles of about 5 Millennia.So they could easily make calendars that went 1,000s of years into the future. But, of course,1,000s of years in the future from 1,000s of years ago brings us to current times whenthe Mayan calendars stop in 2012. Modern newagey people decided that the wiseMayans stopped making calendars because they
knew when the world would end.And because new agers are happy â€“ though scientifically illiterate â€“ people theirvision of 2012 was a great spiritual awakening or world reboot or other hippyconsciousnessexpandingnonsense that the Mayans, who spent time puling strings of thorns through peoples' tongue,probably didn't have in mind. To a normal person the thought that: calendarfinishes therefore end of the world is an odd conclusion to draw.After all, the amount of time in the Universe is infinite and the amount of stone is limited.So, at some point the Mayans had to stop carving calendars.But never mind.
What should have stayed a fringe belief turnedinto mass hysteria with the 2012 disaster movie that swept the academy awards and thenumerous emmynominated apocalypse documentaries on::sigh:: The History Channel.What happened to you guysé Anyway. After this NASA became so inundatedwith questions that they had to take time away from their busy robot building, frontierpushing, knowledge expanding, civilization inspiring schedule, to write a webpage explainingthat no, a humansacrificing, stoneage society with neither wheels to pull carts nor glassto make telescopes, didn't know more about
science at the dawn of history than real scientistsdo today. But the parade of crazy marched on anywaymaking wilder and wilder predictions for Earth including:â€¢ Geomagnetic Reversal (a process that unfolds on a geologic timescale, not a single day)â€¢ A collision with mysterious Planet X (That no astronomers have found)â€¢ A local star going supernova (Despite there being no such candidates)â€¢ An Alien Invasion (Which is ludicrous on the face of itâ€¦ or is ité)â€¢ And a galactic synchronization beam, whatever the hell that is.A sane person, at this point, would wonder
how the Mayans were able to predict astrophysicalanomalies thousands of years in advance and millions of miles away yet didn't foreseethe Spanish coming across the Atlantic. And that's because the Mayans never predictedapocalypse. The only people to claim the Mayans knew about the end of the world were distinctlynot Mayans.ï¿½.